托福备考资料:T友写作范文汇总(十五)

考研 Freekaoyan.com/2008-03-12

TOPIC:Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes.Other believe that going to classes should be optional for students.Which point do you agree with?Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer.
Recently,there have been a large number of university students who do not attend classes. So serious is the problem that it attracts general public's attention. It is quite understandable that there are not only one answer to such a vital question. Some people maintain that university students should attend classes. Other assert that the students should decide by themselves.

Two advantages are held to suppose the former view. Firstly, provided the students attend all the classes which are required, they will learn much more knowledge than study by themselves. Generally,students think they are more than smart, they have thoroughly understood all knowledge of the book. But in fact, many small points which are very essential are often ignored.When facing to the final exa, they begin to regret. Secondly, teachers can help students find out their disadvantages. In the university, all the teachers are full of experience, they know most mistakes that students often make, and they can point them out before students make a bad habit.

Even though there are so many benefits, some people still think that whether go to classes or not should be optional for students. For the one hand, different students have different abilities, some of them spend one hour finishing one test, bet the same test may cost some students two hours. So, if all student must attend all classes, it seem quite unfair to the clever students, in that they will waste much time on the classes. For the other hand, the teachers can not take care all the students. It is particularly understandable that good students are much more popular, so teachers may unconsiously pay more attention to them than to the other students. Thus the bad students will become worse and worse.

From my perspective, I will suppose the second opinion. In that different people possess different interest, if all the students must have the same calsses, there is less time for them to develop their advantages. In addition, I think the university students should have ability to control themselve, even though there are some people to oversee you now, you will be oneself in future, and then, what could you do? So, I agree with the second view.

 

修改意见:
(一)
Two advantages are held to suppose the former view. Firstly, provided the students attend all the classes which are required, they will learn much more knowledge than study by themselves. Generally,students think they are more than smart, they have thoroughly understood all knowledge of the book. But in fact, many small points which are very essential are often ignored.When facing to the final exa, they begin to regret. Secondly, teachers can help students find out their disadvantages. In the university, all the teachers are full of experience, they know most mistakes that students often make, and they can point them out before students make a bad habit.

两个which are有点重复,可不可以把后面的表达换一下。

disadvantages用的有点突兀,而且与段首的两个advantages意思有交叉。

make这个词本身无可厚非,但也许用form更好一点。

it seems quite unfair to the clever students, in that they will waste much time on the classes. For the other hand, the teachers can not take care of all the students.

这两个应该都是typo了

(二)
我觉得这边文章内容已经很详实了, 但是如果在开头就表明观点会好一点.这个题不太适合50-50 的写法.ETS应该不喜欢这种到最后才表明观点的文章.


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