新新写作30天第五天 造句的两大技巧



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【芝麻开门】
  句子是文章的基本单位。成功的作品是由清晰而合乎语法规则的句子组成的。然而一个好的句子除了能够准确表达作者的意思,还需要简洁生动,这是在考试中获得高分的法宝。

  一、句子要简洁

  A hero is nothing but a product of his time.

  时势造英雄。 写作要求精练,因为,简洁的表达能起到更加强调的作用。我们要写出效果好、影响大的文章,就要想方设法1)避免使用空洞、多余的短语;2)避免过多地使用较长的句子结构,如并列句和从属句等;3)避免不必要的重复。请看下面各例:

  1)Owing to the fact that I had a lot of work to do, it wasnt possible for me to accept their invitation.

  本句要表达的意思很简单,可是一堆空洞的短语使句子显得很累赘,改为下面的句子就简洁明了多了。

  I was too busy to accept their invitation.

  2) He is a man who is honest, who always pays his just debts, and who observes the golden rules in his dealings with others.

  英语中比较重要的从属概念可用从句的形式表达,其它次要的概念常用词或短语来表达,因为句子比短语显得更重要。过多地使用从句会把次要的与主要的概念混为一谈,削弱句子的重点。该句可改为:

  He is an honest man who always pays his just debts, and who observes the golden rules in his dealings with others.

  3) My hometown is a quiet, peaceful place. It is quiet and peaceful because of the small number of people living there.

  有时为了构成平行的句子结构或达到强调的目的,我们会重复使用某些词语。但是,无目的地重复会导致笨拙。所以本句可改为:

  My hometown is a quiet, peaceful place because of the small number of people.

  二、语言要生动

  写作时要吸引读者的兴趣,句子就需生动、充满活力。平淡无味的句子会使人生厌,注意力分散。但要写出生动的句子就必须注意做到:

  1.交错使用长短句

  长句和短句各有各的特点,各有各的用场。长句结构复杂、容量大,能表达比较复杂的内容,叙事具体、说理严密。短句结构简单、短小精悍、明白易懂。在写作中应当交错使用长句和短句,使句子的长短多样化,增加语言的表现力。请看下面的一段话:

  It is better to trust to valour than to luck.

  靠运气不如靠勇气。I returned to my room. There was a note under my door. It was from Bob. He said he was in the town looking for a job. He hadnt found anything yet. He added that he was sorry to have missed me.

  这里出现的是一连串的短句,读起来使人感到单调乏味,而且各句之间所固有的逻辑关系没能用句法手段表达出来。为了使文字更为生动,意义更加明确,可做如下改动:

  When I returned to my room, I found a note from Bob under the door. He said he was in the town looking for a job, but hadnt found anything yet. He added that he was sorry to have missed me.

  2.灵活使用多样句式

  要达到语言的生动性,写作时就要经常地变换句型和句子结构及表达思想的方式。切忌所有的句子都用相同的句型或句子结构,使文章读起来单调乏味。

  在考虑英语句式的变化时, 我们一般从以下几个方面入手:

  (1) 既可以用主动式也可以用被动式, 例如:

  例1:Today, we use machines not only in industry but in other sectors of national economy as well.

  Today machines are widely used not only in industry but in other sectors of national economy as well.

  例2:Some people believe that it will be possible for automatic machines to replace completely in the future.

  It is believed by some people that it will be possible for automatic machines to replace completely in the future.

  (2) 既可以用肯定式也可以用否定式, 例如:

  例1: I shall go there unless it rains.

  I shall go there if it doesnt rain.

  例2:Their daily lives dont provide them with the exercise needed to keep them healthy.

  Their daily lives fail to provide them with the exercise needed to keep them healthy.

  (3) 某些修饰成分既可以用在句子前面也可以用在后面, 还可以用在中间, 例如:

  例1:With a car, people can get around freely.

  People can get around freely with a car.

  例2:In fact, speaking is one of the most important means of communication.

  Speaking is in fact one of the most important means of communication.

  (4) 既可以是正常语序也可以是倒装语序, 例如:

  例1:A new type of TV sets was among the products on display.

  Among the products on display was a new type of TV sets.

  例1:We did not realize the problem of energy crisis until the end of last century.

  Not until the end of last century did we realize the problem of energy crisis.

  (5) 既可以用简单句也可以用并列句或者主从复合句, 例如:

  例1:Nowadays a lot of people work in office, spending most of their time indoors.

  Nowadays a lot of people work in office and they spend most of their time indoors.

  例2:There are many means of getting information and they enable us to keep up with what is going on in the world.

  There are many means of getting information which enable us to keep up with what is going on in the world.

  例3:Doonesbury cartoons satirize contemporary politics. The victims of political corruption pay no attention. They prefer to demand that newspapers not carry the strip.

  Doonesbury cartoons laugh at contemporary politics, but the victims of political corruption pay no attention and prefer to demand that newspapers not carry the strip.

  例4:The campus parking problem is getting worse. The university is not building any new garages.

  The campus parking problem is getting worse because the university is not building any new garages.

  Ignorance is the mother of impudence.

  无知是鲁莽之源。

  3.善用形象化语言

  适当地使用一些修辞手法如比喻、夸张、排比、拟人等能更形象、更深刻地说明事理,增加文章的活力。例如:

  In the morning the dust hung like fog, and the sun was as red as ripe new blood. (明喻)

  His daughter is the apple of his eyes. (暗喻)

  An idea spoke within him, racing through his mind. (拟人)

  His voice was loud enough to wake the dead. (夸张)

  Many of us allow our children to eat junk, watch junk, listen to junk, talk junk, play with junk, and then we are surprised when they turn out to be social junkies. (排比)

  4.恰当使用英语习语

  写作时适当地使用习语、成语等也是使语言生动活泼的好办法。如:

  Once a man is dead, there is no helping; you cant rekindle the spark of life in him.

  本句中的there is no helping是汉语式的英语,不符合英语的习惯说法。这里虽然用了比喻,但更改了原来的主语,句子显得罗嗦、笨拙。如果改成下面的习惯表达,句子变得既简洁又生动。

  Once a man is dead, he cant be brought back to life.

  再如The committee refused to listen to our request. 如果被改成The committee turned a deaf ear to our request. 句子生动,增加了文采。

  活动教室

  〖〗请修改下面的短文增加句式的多样化以便使其生动、流畅。

  We are terrified of death. We do not think of it, and we dont speak of life. We dont mourn in public. We dont know how to console a grieving friend. In fact, we have eliminated or suppressed all the traditional rituals surrounding death.

  The Victorians coped with death differently. Their funerals were elaborate. The yards of black crepe around the hearse, hired professional mourners, and its solemn procession to an ornate tomb is now a distant memory. They wore mourning jewelry. They had a complicated dress code for the grieving process. The rituals severed a psychological purpose in helping the living deal with loss.【友情提示】

  句式多样化是英语作文取得高分的灵丹妙药,请你一定要勤学苦练,掌握这一招。另外,在使用一些修辞方法和英语习语的时候,要注意尽量避免老套的比喻或尽人皆知的习语。

  One careless move may lose the whole game.

  一步不慎,满盘皆输。

  美文赏析

  How to Succeed in a Job Interview

  To be successful in a job interview, you should demonstrate certain personal and professional qualities. You need to create a good image in the limited time available, usually from 30 to 45 minutes. You must make a positive impression which the interviewer will remember while he interviews other candidates. The following are some qualities you should especially pay attention to during an interview.

  First or all, you should take care to appear to be properly dressed. The right clothes worn at the right time can win respect of the interviewer and his confidence in your judgment. It may not be true that clothes make the man, but the first and often last impression of you is determined by the clothes you wear.

  Secondly, you should pay close attention to you manner of speaking, since speech is a reflection of personality. You should reflect confidence by speaking in a clear voice, loud enough to be heard, without being aggressive or overpowering. You should be prepared to talk knowledgeably about the requirements of the position you are applying for, to be really impressive you must convey a sense of selfconfidence and enthusiasm for work.

  If you display these characteristics, with just a little luck, youll certainly succeed in the typical personnel interview.

  这是一篇有关“应聘面试”的说明性文章,全文语言朴实生动,用词变换多样,即用不同的表达方式来表达同样的意思,譬如,“demonstrate”“display”“take care to”“pay close attention to”。



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